Fun and Games

Today in class the teacher was discussing Robespierre and the French Revolution. I found her teaching to be lacking, so I volunteered some information that I thought might help her in her teaching. She disagreed with the assertion that the stench emulating from the masses was critical in their eventual victory over the aristocracy. I told her that she was an ignorant bitch and why were we learning about the light-in-the-loafer French pansies anyway, Bush hates them and so do I. She liked these comments even less, so I was banished to the sunshine and beautiful co-eds walking around campus, while everyone else had to listen to her drivel. I win, they lose.

While walking I remembered that I had rolled a blunt this morning and had put it into my backpack. I decided to see what would happen if I sat down on the library steps and smoked it. So I walked over to the library, sat down on the steps, examined the dozen or so students milling around, and sparked it. It was amusing to watch the students walking by sniff the air as they caught a whiff of my blunt and look over at me. Wow, I'm breaking social norms, the Force must be strong in this one. About half way through my blunt I had probably had about 20 or so people giving me the stink-eye, but no one had mustered up the balls to say anything to me. A few people had laughed and shook their heads, but that was about it. Finally, an older, bearded guy with a briefcase who I figured was a professor came out of the library, smelled the air, and looked at me like I had grown a second head out of my ass. He walked over to me and asked in a voice of disbelief, "are you smoking... reefer?" Somehow, the look on his face along with him saying, reefer made this situation all the more surreal (the blunt was kicking in as well). "I don't think so sir..." I began, slowly rising to my feet, "...someone handed this to me, let me take a look..." Suddenly I reversed the blunt and blew a huge shotgun blast right at this geezer's gaping maw. He was so shocked he inhaled smoke for a second or two, then started on a huge coughing fit.

While he was thusly occupied I ran off for a few minutes, only stopping when I knew that no one had followed me. I checked my watch and realized that I had another class in 15 minutes.
I briefly contemplated attending but then decided I would go home and play some Halo 2 online. I drove home, listening to Rammstein and swerving to try to run over any squirrels in the road. I think I may have got one. Back at the crib my fat roommate was sitting on the couch sipping on an Icehouse 22 oz. beer, eating cheetos and watching Dr. Phil. My two-footer was on the floor next to the couch. I felt a hot flash of rage as the bong had been up in my closet and I hadn't given him permission to go into my room and get it. I decided mr. fat fuck was gonna get a little comeuppance for this one. I walked up the stairs to my room, retrieved my 15 pound Brunswick bowling ball from my closet and came about halfway down the stairs. From my vantage point, I was about 5 feet away from the back of this bastards head. I lobbed my ball right into the back of the empty melon this imbecile calls a head and watched him roll forward onto the carpet, blood oozing freely from under his matted hair. I then got a towel to put over the blood, pressed the TV/Video button twice, and powered up the X-Box. M.F.F was making these annoying moaning sounds so I turned up the volume pretty high and started killing aliens with my clan members that were also skipping class/work. Fun and Games rule!