A view to a kill

I am just a country boy and not real tech savvy. This is just a test since blogger made posting pics much easier.

Ten Bars

Big month for me. Shit will either come together or fall apart.
I need to relax, I need to spring for a good massage.
I hope the Hawks trade our draft pick and get Hakim Warrick and Jarret Jack in exchange.
Bobby Cox is one of the top three managers of all-time.
Karl Rove deserves a good beating followed by exile.
My last post was influenced by both Stephen King and South Park if anyone gets the references.
I don’t see how people continue smoking blunts everyday, my lungs can’t take that shit anymore.
I want to buy some throwing knives.
I am accurate with throwing knives.
I would not miss Karl Rove’s fat head with a throwing knife.

The Power of Prayer

You have brains in your head.You have feet in your shoes.You can steer yourself any direction you choose. – Dr. Seuss

Far below the stained glass and other decorative frivolity of the church was its true epicenter. Here, closer to their true God, they made their offerings to HIM, and were rewarded through HIS boons. Tonight was a special night, for HIS thirst was vast, best satiated by the blood of the innocent. The child had been “rescued” from a crack-addict prostitute living in a nearby tenement. The mother had supposedly been gang raped as a punishment for taking the night off and that was when the child was conceived. It would otherwise be impossible to distinguish the father but this attack had left her hospitalized for a month. She would be found dead in the morning thanks to the “hot shot” that they had provided her, but the child would never be found.

He cried as his flesh touched the obsidian altar. The chants from all around him, while low and melodic, did not soothe the child. Perhaps he could sense the spirits of the countless others who had died in the exact same place over the last millenia. Perhaps he was but tired and alone. The rites were performed and the blood ran down into the canals carved into the floor. The fire flickered in the mirrored surface of Soth Nasooth’s Reptilian eyes.

The next morning the Mass centered around the need for humanity and to treat well those around you. Father Callahan could still taste the blood he had drank the night before. Thankfully, the Communion wine failed to wash away its succulent flavor from his palatte. The collection plate did not disappoint. Things were proceeding well.

My girlfriend and I went on a picnic. I don't know how she did it, but she got poison ivy on the brain. When it itched, the only way she could scratch it was to think about sandpaper. –Steven Wright

...now, if that's a fact, tell me, am I lying?

From my June 3rd post:

While this would be reason enough for such a publicity stunt, I see an even more sinister motive. I think that Cruise wants the spotlight on him so that he can attempt to draw more people into Scientology. You know, the "religion" that is banned from several countries due to the fact that it is really a cult created by L. Ron Hubbard that teaches about alien overlords that control our galaxy and other such nonsense. I mean shit, if people are too stupid to see through the logical fallacies and lies that the U.S. government has been spewing for the past five years, why would they doubt Maverick?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/8333804/

Vinnie's evening

His spittle was flecked with blood as he spit in my face.
I responded by laying his leg across a chair and hitting his knee with a sledgehammer.
“Kneecapping,” the kids like to call it.
I had never heard a man scream that high or that long until I did it.
Now I have.
The fight was pretty much out of him after that, and that’s too bad.
I had admired him. He had balls.
Now he’s just a crippled corpse with a bullet in its head.
Ce la vie.
The fettucini was marvelous at Magliano’s.

Six times

The buyer's insolvency does not negate the obligation to the seller unless the original contract was void to begin with because of unconscionability issues.

That boy is crazier than a shithouse rat.

I wish Pai Mei would teach me the five-point palm exploding heart technique.

Pocket QQ's six times tonight in the MTT (cracked 2/6), finally beaten by AKd that flopped the flush. Never got the Rockets. 533/2000

IFC is showing a great documentary of the filming of Land of the Dead.

Time for Aqua Teen then bedtime. Don't do anything I wouldn't do.

Humpty Dumpty

The mirror has shattered
A thousand pieces of yourself stare up at the whole
If the mirror could be made whole again
Would you want it to be
How much of you would you trim away
Before you yourself
Are not yourself
But someone else
Watching

Congratulations Josh!

I just discovered that Atlanta resident Josh Arieh (3rd in last years WSOP main event) took down event #12 of this years series, taking home $380,000 and some change. Good job representing the Dirty Dirty man!

The Game is to be sold, not told

I've got a really good idea for a story but I can't yet figure out how to write it real well. It involves a scene with nude young girls and excessive drinking and fucking. As it goes on, it becomes increasingly clear that this is a dream sequence. Then the dreamer wakes and is told by his assistant that he needs to prepare for the mass he is to lead in an hour, "your excellency". Get it? He's the Pope. And he just had a dream about fucking some teenagers. Maybe I'll write it soon. And forget that you read this.

*italics denote good google search phrases*

Peaches and Pears

At the arcade playing Golden Axe he plotted her demise. His magic was weak but he had alot of health and the best weapon. I never thought I'd die fighting next to an elf but next to a friend I can do. BFWB. Screen on the green is for the birds and reefer madness would be a good choice to show. Birth of a Nation as well but most wouldn't get the joke. Fuck em. Get 'er done. What if a werewolf bit a vampire or vice versa. Underworld style? Probably nothing since they don't exist. Could Danger Mouse take out Mighty Mouse? Dr. Claw is a chump. Satan is my motor. Or so it seems.

I never want to hear you say..... I want it that way

J10 beats 22 which beats AK which beats J10
Riots were avoided today by a 46 year old alleged child molester going free
A fat Irish man ended Tyson's career
What if there were multiple "big bangs" in the void of the multiverse and and some point, at some place, they could bounce off each other and unmake what they created
Fuck Colorado and John Elway
Fuck the Texas Rangers and Oakland A's
You know what show I used to really like? The great grape ape.
Cannibalism is a real solution to world hunger
Gladiatorial Games is an untapped multi-billion dollar market
A blessing on all who read these words

My once mighty empire

I was the king of four-square. While it was my skill and relentless ruthlessness that raised me to these Olympian heights, it was my arrogance that was the seed of my demise. I controlled the one-square, I made the rules. Slams, Jams, bobbling, carrying, tea party, isolation, all of these weapons were at my disposal at any time. If I was late to recess, people would automatically eliminate themselves so that I could reclaim my rightful place in seat one. There was but one ruler of the four-square court during fourth-grade recess that year, and it was me. One man dared to challenge me that year, he had been rabble-rousing for quite some time attempting to get others to turn against me, but I rebuffed his attempts and slammed him out of the game countless times. My taunts undoubtedly rang in his ears as he trudged to the back of the line. Eventually though, people began to listen to him and one day we played a point where he caught my slam and then eliminated me with a mighty jam. I was then the pariah of the four-square world, and others attempted to eliminate me at every opportunity from then on. The declaration of four-square was written, and recess was never the same. My kingdom in rubble, its specter existing only in my mind.

Random cantseefade quote of the weekend:

random cute girl at party: "Why is everyone being so nice to me?"
cantseefade: "Look around you, you are an attractive girl and everyone here wants to fuck you."

Random link featuring Jessica Alba in a seethrough dress. Sweet!

Obligatory Celebrity gossip

I don't understand these infatuations with celebrities. Sure many are hot bitches and they all have a lot of cash, but that has nothing to do with the people who waste money on magazines and waste their time reading and watching television about these vapid, pampered, loudmouths. With that being said.....

Want to hear something I thought about the other day? I had heard that Tom Cruise had been having his "people" put their feelers out for hot young actresses for him to pursue a few months back. The number one girl on his list was Kate Bosworth who apparently was not interested. Number two was Jessica Alba who was similarly disinterested. So the third attempt was the charm for our middle-aged cult member who turned his affections unto the cute, innocent seeming Katie Holmes who had girlishly told Vogue magazine "I want to marry Tom Cruise someday."

Apparently his advances have proved effective as he has been seen making out with and spending time with young Ms. Holmes at every opportunity. Many think that Cruise is gay and that this is just a sham. That could be true, although I doubt it. I think that the real reason for this relationship, as well as his infamous Oprah appearance where he basically acted like a damn fool stems from another reason.

I think that all this is a ploy to get Cruise back into the public consciousness, where he had pretty much fallen out of as he is getting old and hasn't really had a hit movie since The Last Samurai. Banging Katie Holmes definitely placed the spotlight back on Cruise.... just in time for his upcoming summer blockbuster War of the Worlds. While this would be reason enough for such a publicity stunt, I see an even more sinister motive. I think that Cruise wants the spotlight on him so that he can attempt to draw more people into Scientology. You know, the "religion" that is banned from several countries due to the fact that it is really a cult created by L. Ron Hubbard that teaches about alien overlords that control our galaxy and other such nonsense. I mean shit, if people are too stupid to see through the logical fallacies and lies that the U.S. government has been spewing for the past five years, why would they doubt Maverick?

"Sooner or later we'll all see who the prophet is."- Nas, Nas is like

Here is an excerpt from my post on February 16:

At any rate here are my bold midseason NBA picks.

Eastern Conference Finals: Miami over Detroit 4-2
Western Conference Finals: San Antonio over Phoenix 4-1
NBA Championship: Miami over San Antonio 4-3

All I got to say is go Heat on Saturday!!

Death of a Salesman

So there I was, perfectly relaxed and content in my home. I was cooking up some Black pearl on the stove and listening to "Dez only one" by the Witchdoctor when I heard the doorbell ring. I was right in the middle of singing along with Andre on my favorite verse of the song:

The Sun shines
The Moon Glows
The Wind Blows
The Rain Falls
But that ain't all
My heart pumps with a rhythm yall.....

....and this unexpected disturbance broke my timing.

I had just caught back up with the rapid-fire delivery when the doorbell rang again. An involuntary growl rumbled from my throat and I eyed the rack of carving knives to my left. Della Reece's classic line from Harlem Knights resonated in my head "Now I got to cut cha, thats the rule." I placed my spoon next to the stove, selected the cleaver from the rack and started towards the front door. Halfway there the doorbell rang again. Muthafucker must be impatient to die, I thought. I flung open the door and saw it was some middle-aged white guy with a briefcase. "Hello sir, may I interest you in some...." He never finished what he was saying because I stabbed the knife into his chest as hard as I could. I am a pretty strong guy but this fucker must have had a titanium breastbone or something cause I could only get it in about 3/4 of the way to the hilt. I could feel the bone splintering as I did it though. He gasped for a couple of seconds and then fell backwards.

I dragged his body inside after I had put some plastic down and then went through his briefcase. Here's the kicker: HE WAS TRYING TO SELL ME LIFE INSURANCE!!!!
I had a few hours of laughs about that one after I shot up. I hope he bought some of his own!! Man that's funny. It more than made up for me missing out on my song. I just requed it after all had settled down. Yep, I rule.

In Theatres June 24

This is going to be awesome!

My All-NBA team:
PG Lebron James
SG DeWayne Wade
C Shaq
PF Amare Stoudemire
SF Tracy McGrady

This rain ain't bothering me now cause I'm working and shit but it better cease soon. You heard what I said there God. Better listen up or there will be consequences and repercussions. I'm just saying tho.